Me and My Gallbladder

A gallstone wedged in the liver or stuck in a canal that runs between it and the gallbladder…

Huge pain, from a bundle of nerves, it radiates under the shoulder blade or is it in front by the solar plexus?

The hot pain is constant for hours, finally a change, a gag reflex, heaving and up comes everything in the stomach.

6 hours in the emergency to get a bed and a blood check.

The doc sends me home, in the wee hours of the morning.

Slash 15 years later, I check my progress.

Still have gallstones, according to the ultrasound and doctor.

I am keeping a healthy diet:  much more veggie.

Is my gallbladder worth enduring all the pain?

It’s not bad when I eat right.

And I suffer a little in the late night and wee hours, but I am staying on track with proper diet, exercise and lifestyle.

My gallbladder reminds me what is important.

And if I loose it someday, it will because of an infection, or a good medical reason, not because of a lack of trying.

Glass Poetry

8 and a half by eleven,

A plate glass panel with engraved poetry,

Live, love, laugh…

Platitudes like ‘ meditate on good thoughts until you can meditate well.

The Writing Journal

Gripped in the Talmud of a tonality, a sweeping experience of true dissonance:  my musical journey.

Homophobic erotica depicting masturbation that is flaccid, frustrating and painful may be an emotional journey of letting go of guilt through association.

Tirade of emblems that presuppose design on all things made of god.

Or passionate rants about bobulous babes of the opposite sex (same sex, or no sex).

These canon like entries into my journal (or diary) are not meant to see the light of public consumption.

The truth is personal, specific to one’s own knowledge, stylized in their voice (using 1st person on many occasions).

But a journal may be on any and all topics that thwart or endear the masses.

Yet, not all reader or writer, neither or both hast gazed upon thine navel to propagate prose in this vein or humors.

Tsk-tsk, on one’s neighbour’s folly, thyself, and all…than roam upon this inhabited planet floating in the milky way.

Go now, and write upon the hill, your classic dialogue that speaks to one, no one or many!


Going To The Doctor

The ritual of cleaning up the body, preparing the mind and learning about the clinic, doctor and registration process.

How often is a check up necessary?

How often is it important to see the doctor?


The experience of a doctor’s visit.

Using the out comes to the best advantage.

Do you need a second opinion?

Does it harm you to follow the doctor’s orders?

When to question a doctors authority.


Many people need to go to the doctor on the regular basis.

Some not so often.

To learn the difference.

Being a good patient.

When to complain or sue?


Most of us can benefit from learning how to use the doctor in a safe manner.

Education can teach us to be safe and have an easier time when we are sick and need to see a doctor right away.

Using a clinic, a family doctor, a specialist or the Emergency.

Learning our way around medical insurance and the rest of the system of information.


Obtaining a clean bill of health.

What if, I am sick?

How to get better and follow the doctor’s instructions.

Using the medical system is easier said than done, we can all benefit from a little support, information, understanding, patience and good will.



The Disease Called Loneliness

“Excuse me,” a young woman raises her hand on the bus. “Does anyone know when to pull the bell to get off at the mall?”

Meanwhile two other young women turn to each other with grimacing disapproval.

The individual is building self esteem and keeps low expectations.

The paired couple are attempting to discourage this young woman’s building her self-esteem.

The pattern of any person learning to get their needs meet can be taught by parents, schools, churches and by playing in other social groups.

To even make a friend is a risk many people will not do these days.

Social media and other devices are prompting people to choose a “bad behaviour over a good one”.

People prefer their smartphone to risking self esteem to pursue low expectations from social activities that are used as venues to pursuing greater expectations and greater risking of self-esteem necessary to overcome lonely feelings.

The “great debate” has yet to become public over issues of loneliness, but we can all agree it is costly and in epidemic proportions.

Take every risk presented to you, wherever you stand on the loneliness continuum to foster your subjective wellbeing!

Lightening Is Electricity

Know your story, he was able to make many connections across disciplines: but he devoted himself to writing the story.

He had a passion for reading, writing, thinking, dreaming and creating things or making things up to write a good story.

What a curious thing, why would light carry all the energy from one cell to the other, it is transmitting electrical current from one cloud to another and dissipating electrical energy as heat. Surely, electrical energy is in its highest state when appearing as lightening & thunder.

Who am I to beg questions about such things? How does the weather turn cold? Is cold a lower state of energy?

He made an exam out of life. He welcomed an opportunity to live and examine his own with the self styled Socratic approach of philosophy. He studied his mind to uncover the proper use of impressions.

This lightening and electricity run through the mind like it does in the clouds, from cell to cell…

Anxiety Of Being (the simple feeling)

Behavior is important when working through very complex parts of being human.

I am describing being able to express feelings, actions, thoughts, beliefs, and who we are on the regular basis.

A big part of being me is about knowing who I am.

There is a lot of awareness or noticing who I am to be the best I can be in the moment.

I’m not a sadist, vain, egotist, arrogant, belligerent or a bully.

But I get depressed, sad, sentimental, scared, afraid, tired, lonely, hungry (cravings, lustful, jealous, obsessive, and ashamed from time to time).

But, don’t we all.

I get happy, calm, bored, aloof, lazy, driven, motivated, anxious, lively, alert, clear, excited, sober, and abrupt.

I feel, think, accept, act, believe and maintain a decent state of awareness.

I struggle to be responsible in a balanced sort of way.

Therefore, I believe there is a great deal of anxiety generated from simple day to day struggles to maintain a healthy level of self -control.

So, I take every opportunity I can to deconstruct my state of anxiety to determine the best course in the moment.

I usually, journal, talk to myself, and think about the day.

I practice good habits each day.

A good one for my anxiety is to act on my best behavior whenever I am tired, lonely, hungry or angry.

I can usually control my feelings better by practicing good habits when my energy is high, moderate or low.

I tend to take things on when my energy is high or moderate but minimize my action when my energy is low.

I believe all my life is important in shaping me into a good life.

I believe in doing a good job with my ‘bad-self’.

I will always take care of myself, so I can live well and engage myself and others in a healthy way.

I guess I have been blessed with good people and support and a willingness to be a healthy person.

So, why all the hubbub about being ‘anxious’?

I want to embrace my anxiety and use this feeling to express self-control and doing no harm to myself and others.

I am learning to act in a responsible, loving way in all my affairs: living well is it’s own reward!

Best of luck to all those trying to do the same in their lives.